sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
What a dumb baby whore.
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
Randomize
