been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
