i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize
