I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
It was a blind-side dick pic.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
