I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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