I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Randomize