dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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