My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Randomize
