I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
