After last night, I could never be a politician.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Randomize