i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
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