To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
