your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize