Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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