Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
