I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Randomize
