Jerry, you need to find god
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Randomize
