so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Is that strawberry winking at me??
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
