At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
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