So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
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