My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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