yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
