Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
