Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
