I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
