Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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