Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
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