I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
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