I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Randomize
