Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
Randomize
