Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize
