Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Dear sober self: your car keys are in the glove compartment, your car is outside the church. I hope you're reading this from your own bed instead of someone else's.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Randomize