so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Randomize
