D3 body, D1 cock
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize
