why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
