drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize