From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
