I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
There are leaves in my underwear?
Randomize
