so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
