walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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