she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
Randomize
