the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
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