I want to walk on stilts...naked
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
