ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
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