You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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