I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
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