He is such a slut. More and more my type.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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