How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
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