when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
Randomize
