Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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