how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
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